Woman can't return a birthday present from a friend, so she makes a last-ditch effort: ‘Her message said "any chance you could just send me the cash instead?" She put the receipt total in there as well, $63.48, and she followed up again on Sunday’

Author image for Olivia Arocena
Olivia Arocena • Writer and Editor
Sep 5, 2026 12:00 PM EDT

Desperate times call for desperate measures

I don't know if you've ever been there, but when you suddenly need money, everything becomes an opportunity to get it. That jacket that's been sitting in your closet for ages? Fair enough, it's time to (desperately) sell it. That present you didn't like? It's about time to return it.

It's not easy to be in a desperate economic situation, but in any case, that's not your friend's responsibility; you shouldn't make them 'pay' for that. There might not even be a problem asking them for the money if you need someone to lend it to you, but I don't think they should give you money just because the store refused to give it to you and only gave you store credit.

On the one hand, it's incredibly ungrateful and, dare I say, distasteful, but on the other hand, it just makes no sense.  

Is it normal to expect this from a friend who kindly gifted you something? Wouldn't it be better to just ask for the money if you need it than to make it about a gift? Is the gifter friend beeing too nice about it?

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  • Cheezburger Image 10661669888
    via Simona Sergi

    The returned gift

    Still frame for contextual reference only

  • AITA for not sending my friend the $63.48 she asked for?

    I got my friend a set of ceramic bowls for her birthday in July. She had pointed them out in a shop back in the spring and I remembered, which I was honestly quite pleased with myself about. She
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  • opened them in front of everyone and said she loved them. 2 weeks ago she messaged to say she had returned them and only got store credit she will
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  • never use. Her message said "any chance you could just send me the cash instead?" She put the receipt total in there as well, $63.48, and she followed up again on Sunday.
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  • What makes this harder than I want it to be is this. She lost her job in April and has been doing shifts at a place she hates since then. She is not being greedy, she needs a coat
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  • more than she needs bowls, and if she had just asked me for money in the first place I would have sent it without thinking about it. But I keep going back to
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  • the fact that she gave me the figure to the cent. She looked at that receipt properly. And I think what I actually want is for the bowls to have been the thing, and I am aware that
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  • Cheezburger Image 10661669632
    via Alexander Grey

    Counting every cent

    Actor performance of story events

  • says more about me than it does about her. I haven't replied yet. AITA if I say no?
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  • Itidder NTA However, since she's going through hard times, I'd give her $65 in exchange for the gift receipt then buy something nice for myself. You help her out, keep the friendship, and have something nice.
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  • Chance-Animal1856 * NTAH. it's awful she lost her job. Still not your responsibility to give her money. She'll have to take more shifts at the place she hates or look somewhere else for work
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  • Clessie32 NTA. You are being lovely by gracefully accepting that she returned the bowls. A lot of people would be twisted up about that. But it is not your responsibility to provide a replacement gift.
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  • Cheezburger Image 10661670144
    via Kev Costello

    The friend making a last ditch effort

    Actor performance of story events

  • If I were her, I would call my friend and tell her I can lend her the money if she wants, but explain that it is not my responsibility to give her cash in return for a gift I thought of specifically for her. I totally understand she doesn’t like it and won’t use the store credit, but it’s not her friend’s responsibility and is frankly distasteful. If she needs the money, that’s another conversation, but let’s talk about that and not about the present then. To me, keeping matters transparent when it comes to economic stuff is best. This friend has a good heart; there’s nothing to lose.

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friendship friends toxic relationship
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